"You guys know I’m not prone to exaggeration, but this advice is the cancer rotting the vital organs of civilization." — David Wong
#4. “You Just Need to Cheer Up!”
Here’s why I think “You just need to cheer up!” is the downfall of civilization: It’s the fact that we’re treating sadness like it’s a heart attack or a seizure, something that requires an emergency response. It’s not — it’s a perfectly normal, valid state of mind. Sometimes things don’t go your way, so you get sad about it. Then things get better and you’re happy and the happiness is sweeter because you remember being sad.*
And I think this belief that a normal, well-adjusted human should be happy every waking moment is killing us.
Ever wanted to be more than your company’s Stand Next To Fern Person? John Cheese can help.
#4. Don’t Keep Your Goals (and Accomplishments) to Yourself
Most of us have been brought up to exercise some semblance of modesty. … It’s not so good when it comes to real-world performance reviews that define your pay scale. Unfortunately, letting your boss know about your accomplishments is an acquired talent. You have to be careful how often you let people know, as well as what tone you take when you do it. Otherwise you come off as an attention whore who’s just fishing for a pat on the back. Don’t do it enough, and they’ll just assume you’re doing what’s asked of you and no more.
Important things to remember.
1. The world doesn’t revolve around you.
It revolves around me. Each person is it’s own microcosm and its very own sun, so YOU might thing that things revolve around you, but so will your best friend and your siblings and THAT’S FINE.
2. If you’re feeling out of the loop and that makes you angry? You get two choices: make your own loop and enjoy what happens in it, or shove yourself into the other loop and make your own space there. Getting angry because others are enjoying something you’re not part off? Makes you a toddler.
3. Try as we might, most of humanity AREN’T mind readers - and I’m leaving that most since, hey, what do I know, right - so most people WON’T be able to magically guess that you are angry or upset if you don’t speak. And by speak I mean ‘hey, I’m angry about this’ rather than a very passive aggressive ‘YOU should know why’. Own your anger and hurt feelings and VOICE them.
4. The only person who is responsible for your emotional well being is you. Yes, being with others might make you happy and you might have a significant other who brightens or dampens your day, but, in the end, the one who is going to make you happy is yourself. YOU are responsible of doing the right things for yourself, doing the things you like or what fulfills you. That someone else doesn’t like you, or that they like someone else sucks, but it’s YOU the one who has to stand up. Stop wanting someone else to carry you because, let’s face it, it’s not going to happen.
5. Romantic movies and stories and manga and whatever are great hobbies if they are to your taste. However, please, be aware that they arefictional.Very, very few people will actually get that kind of love story - and, again, using this because hey, what do I know - but this? Doesn’t make their love any less true. Romantic fiction is idealized and set with a very focused storyline that is already planned. In real life? Things don’t happen like that. So if you’re sitting down waiting for the perfect person that will accept you like you and who’ll love your everything? You’re going to be sitting down for a very freaking long time and *nothing will happen*. Make your own stories happen.
6. Because it bears repeating: passive agressiveness is tiring in a five years old. If you’re older than that, it’s not only tiring, it’s fucking annoying. Own up to your fucks up, own up to your bad feelings and own to your voice and speak. up.
Kat reposted a nice piece about true rape prevention, which reminded me of this little list I whipped up a few months ago. As I just did a college RA training yesterday, re-reading this made me laugh. I mean seriously, the “tips” they give potential victims are so condescending. It’s fun to…
I had to reblog this. I has to.
First Cosplay Screw-ups
We all have them, whether we like to admit it or not. We’ve had those first cosplay fuck-ups; bad wigs, closet-cosplay, self-sustained injuries, ect. Rarely does someone come out of the starting gate to their first-con perfect from the get-go, and some of them learn from experience. Others won’t, and end up repeat offenders with their shiny-wigged, pinned-on, tacky photos plastered all over the internet as examples of what NOT to do. First-time cosplayers, here are some useful tips I have learned by trial and error.
De haber sabido yo estas vainas hace años…
Aunque he sidetracked la cuestión de las pelucas cosplayeando charas con mi mismo color de pelo, pero eventualmente ya no podré evadir el detalle de que ya no puedo sacar el mismo peinado.